I’ve noticed recently that Leon has been getting upset much more easily, especially when he can’t get what he wants or when something doesn’t go as he expected. During these moments, he may throw things, run away, scream, cry, and try to hide.
Is this something that is common at his age – he is 7 – or could it indicate that something else is going on? Do you have any recommendations for strategies or resources that could help manage these situations and support him better?
Answer:
So if you haven't checked it out already go read the Autism Mom's Survival Guide to Problem Behavior. It's in the study vault and in the files section on the facebook group here:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/cfocmasterclass/permalink/861745561675332
First things first, let me reframe your question a bit, because it's going to change how we solve this.
Whether or not Leon's reactions are "normal for age 7" isn't actually the question we need to answer. What matters is understanding why he's reacting this way, because once we know the function of the behavior, we can teach him a better way to communicate what he needs.
From what you've described: getting upset when he can't get what he wants, or when things don't go as expected, I'm seeing a pattern. This sounds like tangible-seeking behavior (he wants access to something specific) and/or escape/avoidance (something disrupted his plan or routine and he wants out of the situation). Both of these are completely solvable.
The throwing, running, screaming, and hiding are all his way of communicating: "This isn't what I wanted" or "This isn't what I expected and I need things to change." He just doesn't have the tools yet to communicate that appropriately. That's our job to teach him.
Here's what I need to know to help you best:
What is he typically trying to get access to when he escalates? (a specific toy, activity, person, food, screen time, etc.)
How often is this happening per day/week?
Are there specific times of day or situations where it happens most?
Once I understand the pattern better, we can build a targeted action plan that teaches Leon an appropriate way to express what he needs while we simultaneously make it less likely these behaviors will happen in the first place.
This is absolutely manageable. Let me know those details and we can go from there.
Michelle
So if you haven’t checked it out already go read the Autism Mom’s Survival Guide to Problem Behavior. It’s in the study vault and in the files section on the facebook group here:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/cfocmasterclass/permalink/861745561675332
First things first, let me reframe your question a bit, because it’s going to change how we solve this.
Whether or not Leon’s reactions are “normal for age 7” isn’t actually the question we need to answer. What matters is understanding why he’s reacting this way, because once we know the function of the behavior, we can teach him a better way to communicate what he needs.
From what you’ve described: getting upset when he can’t get what he wants, or when things don’t go as expected, I’m seeing a pattern. This sounds like tangible-seeking behavior (he wants access to something specific) and/or escape/avoidance (something disrupted his plan or routine and he wants out of the situation). Both of these are completely solvable.
The throwing, running, screaming, and hiding are all his way of communicating: “This isn’t what I wanted” or “This isn’t what I expected and I need things to change.” He just doesn’t have the tools yet to communicate that appropriately. That’s our job to teach him.
Here’s what I need to know to help you best:
What is he typically trying to get access to when he escalates? (a specific toy, activity, person, food, screen time, etc.)
How often is this happening per day/week?
Are there specific times of day or situations where it happens most?
Once I understand the pattern better, we can build a targeted action plan that teaches Leon an appropriate way to express what he needs while we simultaneously make it less likely these behaviors will happen in the first place.
This is absolutely manageable. Let me know those details and we can go from there.
Michelle
ALSO>> I ask this of all my parents… which is nice clean data when these eruptions happen:
A- Antecedent – What happen before the behavior
B- Behavior – What was the behavior exhibited
C- Consequence – What happened after the behavior
The good news is there are only 5 functions/reasons a child will have problem behaviors:
M-Medical – they are in pain or discomfort
E-Escape – Trying to get out of something, away from something
A-Attention – Attention Seeking Behaviors
T-Tangible – Access to Something
S-Sensory- It feels good
Collect the ABC Data and we will figure it out from there