Dear Michelle,
I apologize for my temporary disappearance. I intended to write before our holiday, but time escaped me, and here we are three weeks later. I had many fears about the trip and wanted your advice, but once it started, we had a better time than expected, so I postponed writing.
We combined our holiday with work-related visits to Zagreb and Belgrade (Croatia and Serbia). We met several important business contacts, and our daughter was remarkably patient and didn’t disclose her echolalia. After the work travels, we visited my family and stayed at their house. This includes my brother, his wife, and their three kids, one of whom is my daughter’s age and her best friend for many years. Initially, they played together as usual, but since the first day, my daughter has preferred to stay in our room, coloring and drawing, rather than playing with her cousin. Despite her cousin’s invitations, they only interact when we go out, and even then, it’s more like walking together than playing. Since we will be here for another week, I was wondering if you have any suggestions on how to improve the situation so they don’t grow apart.
Best regards, Marijana
Answer:
Hi Marijana, thank you for your question! Michelle passed this question along to Coach Stacy so I will give you some tips to get your daughter and her cousin interacting more. The first thing I would encourage the cousin to do is join in on activities that your daughter enjoys. Since your daughter has been wanting to stay in your room coloring and drawing, I would start with having her cousin join her for that activity. Even if they are coloring side by side and not interacting initially that is still a good first step to getting them to interact more! Her cousin can also come in with a special coloring book or crayons that your daughter might be interested in which would encourage them to share and color together. Do that for a day or two so they are doing something your daughter enjoys. Next, have her cousin bring in a toy that you think your daughter would like. After some coloring together you can have her cousin show her the toy and see if she wants to play with it. You can even have them take turns with activities. For example, tell your daughter, "Coloring is your choice/turn, now it is X's turn so we are going to play with this toy." You can also set a timer if your daughter is not interested in the toy she chooses. You can say, "We are going to do your cousin's turn for 5 minutes and then it will be your turn and you can do coloring/drawing." Try going back and forth between your daughter's turn and her cousin's turn with different toys/choices. Give these tips and try and let us know how it goes! We will have the cousins hanging out in no time! 🙂
Hi Marijana, thank you for your question! Michelle passed this question along to Coach Stacy so I will give you some tips to get your daughter and her cousin interacting more. The first thing I would encourage the cousin to do is join in on activities that your daughter enjoys. Since your daughter has been wanting to stay in your room coloring and drawing, I would start with having her cousin join her for that activity. Even if they are coloring side by side and not interacting initially that is still a good first step to getting them to interact more! Her cousin can also come in with a special coloring book or crayons that your daughter might be interested in which would encourage them to share and color together. Do that for a day or two so they are doing something your daughter enjoys. Next, have her cousin bring in a toy that you think your daughter would like. After some coloring together you can have her cousin show her the toy and see if she wants to play with it. You can even have them take turns with activities. For example, tell your daughter, “Coloring is your choice/turn, now it is X’s turn so we are going to play with this toy.” You can also set a timer if your daughter is not interested in the toy she chooses. You can say, “We are going to do your cousin’s turn for 5 minutes and then it will be your turn and you can do coloring/drawing.” Try going back and forth between your daughter’s turn and her cousin’s turn with different toys/choices. Give these tips and try and let us know how it goes! We will have the cousins hanging out in no time! 🙂