Hi again, my 7 years old tends to elope when we are out. How can I help him? Need guidance. Thanks in advance.
Answer:
Thank you for your question! I got a very similar question recently regarding elopement so I am going to share my recommendations here, as well. There are two things I am going to recommend here. First, I want you to practice "responding to stop." What this looks like is outside of the normal times you would be going somewhere, I want you both to go somewhere safe and make it a game. If you have a fenced in backyard or a local fenced in playground, that would be great. You are going to tell him, "When I say 'stop' you're going to stop!" Let him run around or just walk around and practice saying "stop!" If he stops, provide lots of praise, cheering, high 5s, tickles, whatever he likes! If you have a second person to help you that would be great, too. Because then you can say "stop" and the second person can stop him if he gets too far. If he does not stop and you need to stop him say something like "that's stopping" because we are treating this like a teaching opportunity. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------In addition to the "stop game" I want you to add reinforcement to the game. Since this is a safety issue I want you to pick what he loves most for him to earn for stopping. Preferred food would be best because that is easiest to give him on the move, but if he is an electronic kid then he can earn the iPad, your phone, etc. for a minute or two before you play some more. For example, let's say he loves M&Ms. You are going to tell him before you start the game, "When I say 'stop' you are going to stop. If you stop, you get an M&M!" If he stops independently cheer and be very excited and give him his M&M and say "nice job stopping!" The goal is if the preferred food is motivating he will be motivated to listen to you and stop. Then you can start doing this outside of the game. When walking to the car tell him, "If you walk nicely to the car you get an M&M!" I would still hold his hand, but as long as he is not pulling or trying to run he can earn the M&M. THIS WILL TAKE TIME AND LOTS OF PRACTICE. But if you are consistent, practice a lot, and use a very preferred reinforcer it will work! Keep us updated on his progress. Good luck!
Thank you for your question! I got a very similar question recently regarding elopement so I am going to share my recommendations here, as well. There are two things I am going to recommend here. First, I want you to practice “responding to stop.” What this looks like is outside of the normal times you would be going somewhere, I want you both to go somewhere safe and make it a game. If you have a fenced in backyard or a local fenced in playground, that would be great. You are going to tell him, “When I say ‘stop’ you’re going to stop!” Let him run around or just walk around and practice saying “stop!” If he stops, provide lots of praise, cheering, high 5s, tickles, whatever he likes! If you have a second person to help you that would be great, too. Because then you can say “stop” and the second person can stop him if he gets too far. If he does not stop and you need to stop him say something like “that’s stopping” because we are treating this like a teaching opportunity. ————————————————————————————————————-In addition to the “stop game” I want you to add reinforcement to the game. Since this is a safety issue I want you to pick what he loves most for him to earn for stopping. Preferred food would be best because that is easiest to give him on the move, but if he is an electronic kid then he can earn the iPad, your phone, etc. for a minute or two before you play some more. For example, let’s say he loves M&Ms. You are going to tell him before you start the game, “When I say ‘stop’ you are going to stop. If you stop, you get an M&M!” If he stops independently cheer and be very excited and give him his M&M and say “nice job stopping!” The goal is if the preferred food is motivating he will be motivated to listen to you and stop. Then you can start doing this outside of the game. When walking to the car tell him, “If you walk nicely to the car you get an M&M!” I would still hold his hand, but as long as he is not pulling or trying to run he can earn the M&M. THIS WILL TAKE TIME AND LOTS OF PRACTICE. But if you are consistent, practice a lot, and use a very preferred reinforcer it will work! Keep us updated on his progress. Good luck!